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Journal of an amateur grey woman

Michigan, June 17, 2020

After 3 months without covering up my roots, I had the idea of using a dry shampoo (because, depending on the type, it turns white as soon as you put it) and photographing myself to see if I would like the result. I sent the photos to my mom on Whatsapp and called her right away.

Me: Hi mom, how are you?

My mother: I´m good, what about you?

Me: have you seen the photos I just sent you?

My mother: wow, you´re so different! Did you color it? (I bet you wanted to be a fly to see her face! kkk).

Me: It was a test and I just decided that I'm going to get gray hair. I´ll stop dyeing my hair right away

My mother: it looks good (as if the body didn't speak! hahaha), but I am not mature enough for that look.

Michigan, July 1, 2021

Hi, I'm Adriana Liberato, I'm 49 years old, I'm married, I have 2 children aged 18 and 21, I'm Brazilian and I currently live in the United States.

I've always loved my hair and I think its natural color matches my skin tone and eyes too. I've never been a fan of beauty salons or dryers. I'm the type of person who washes my hair and leaves with it wet to this day. However, to maintain the natural color, I need to cover up my roots every 30 days (in fact in the last week I've been using the spray to covering up my roots, which comes out when washing). Besides not being convenient, it ruins the hair a lot. Today my hair is 1/3 of what it was when I didn't dye it.

When we were confined by Covid-19 last year, I decided not to dye my hair for 3-4 months because I found a wonderful colorist in California - @jackmartincolorist (we were planning a trip there and I was going to make an appointment with him), who can leave any hair the same shade as the root, in just 1 day. For this, it is necessary to let the root grow, at least, 2 inches. So I let it. But when I realized that quarantine would last much longer than we had imagined, I decided dyeing it myself. I couldn't stand to see myself with hair of different colors (black, white and 50 shades of brown) anymore!

Well, the last time I dyed my hair was on March 22 this year. In other words, 3 months without dyeing. I was taking a patience test with myself. And this time I decided that, regardless of colorist, I'm going to take on the new color. If I go to California or find a professional around here that also does this type of coloring, I'll book it (so I don't have to be negotiating with myself every day to keep this polychromatic hair). Otherwise, I’ll leave it how it is.

Do you know what’s funny? Until recently I only imagined myself graying when I was much older. Even because, by the aesthetic standards we were used to, taking on gray hair is a sign of sloppiness. And if there's one thing I've never been, it's sloppy (look at the internal conflict)! Are you also tired of hearing that only young women can have long hair? What do I do with this information, my friends? I'm glad I've always been a rebel! Towards 50, with gray hair and it’s extremely long!

Turns out maturity is good for something! Today I laugh at the women's reaction when I say I'm not going to dye my hair anymore. I feel sorry for the teenagers... Where is the so-called sisterhood? All jokes aside, how we are influenced by aesthetic pressure, without realizing it. We always need to look young and as gray hair is a sign of aging, most women are terrified of it! As if aging were not a natural process of life that starts from the moment we are born.

Who says you have to give yourself up in terms of appearance just because you've decided to take on gray hair? Of course, as the hair is the frame of the face, we need to pay special attention when we are changing its cut or color. It might be interesting to adapt the color chart (clothes, accessories, makeup) to avoid a pale appearance. The fact is that I will not stop acting as I always did because I decided to “go grey”.

Of course, knowing me, I'm sure there will be days when I'll need to use the spray so I don't fall into the temptation of the toner, but I'll face it. And if I don't like the result, I won't think twice about dyeing again. After all, I'm free to change my mind!

I will take this space to share my transformation process with you. I don't pretend to influence anyone. Everyone has their own time and preferences. I don't think grey hair is for everyone. BTW, I'll be surprised if my mom ever stops coloring hers. But if you feel like taking risks and don't have the courage, we're together!


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